After all, I'm not enough. To move on is different to forget. Am living on and differences would go on. So hold on cause everything will be vice versa baby...Changes will occur as the world revolves to it's core. I love you damn you. NO!

I'm waiting

I look upon the clear blue sky as the rain started to fall. Feelings that started to manifest outside my physical boundaries. I feel the darkness of being alone, being forsaken of someone whom really cares. Everything i wished to have forever was gone. She only knows what's outside my mind and heart. Our relationship blocked her way through those parts. Her understanding over me changes and concluded to a painful result. I'm alone if she won't come back and waiting is the only thing that I could do for her. If ever I have to face the painful reality then I'll try to live but there's no guarantee. I've come this far because you made me hold on to life. Now if your decision is the worst than what I ever can hold. I wish I should just have died long ago for everything would be nothing. All my life I feel I am alone. Like nobody really cares to know me much more than you do. Like nobody understand my feelings and thoughts. I've gained freedom from your words. I've gained happiness all because of your love. Now if you're gone, all I will ever have is nothing but the emptiness deep inside my heart. That I wish you could fill up forever. A dream that keep up as a dream. Now hope makes me alive as I wait. Love makes me to wait. You makes me to wish that you'll forever be mine. I just can't live without your sweet hugs. Your wonderful thoughts and silly jokes. The way you walk and the way you smile makes my world goes around. I might sound like a fool but this words is really your love. This is what makes me to live. I love you if only I could say that to you hoping that the words "I love you too" will reach my heart. But I'll be waiting for your precious answer to unfold itself. I love you. A phrase that is perfect to say for you.

My heart screams for only you.

I felt the heavy burden of this responsibility that my mind shuts to think. We both tried to fight for so long but suddenly I just think that this is the end of it. Those trials we've been through had crushed my sense of sight to the situations we're in. That it causes blindness to my eyes for me to not be able to think. It's been a long fight that is hard and full of suffering.We tried to cling on it and continue to walk with lots of wishes for our future. Yet, everything became so suddenly. Just by a glimpse my everything which is you started to crumble and disappear. I just started to surrender to our promise that forever will be always with us. I broke your heart and made you cry and it was all because of my selfishness. I'm afraid to love you more for I've been inflicting only pain in your heart. I wish to hide to my weaknesses for me not to be able to hurt you anymore. But all of that was wrong. I shouldn't have let my heart go for you are everything I have. You are everything I wish. I know I didn't show improvements but I'm planning to. It's hard to change I admit and also I am weak. So letting you go is not really my choice. You don't know how much pain that I need to endure just to say those words to you but I know it's nothing compared to the pain you have gained. I don't want to make you cry, specially to hurt you. I just tried to make a choice for you to be able to live a life smiling and free from all the sufferings that I'm inflicting to you but the truth is I also can't let you go. I want to be with you forever. To be able to see our children playing while embracing you. All my life I been looking for a person whom can make my world complete and it was you. It is only you. I'm not afraid to be alone, I am afraid to live without you. Please forgive me. I'm asking for another chance to make this precious relationship to grow. Bata I love you and I will fight for you.